Finally, a Greene candidate!

Contributed by Rusty DePass

I want to compliment Congressman Jim Clyburn for his recent contribution to the political debate.  The idea that he found what he considers “elephant dung” in U. S. Senate candidate Alvin Greene’s electoral success really elevates the discussion and helps to focus on substantive issues. 

How could his constituents have possibly not followed instructions to vote for Victor Rawl?  Now, in the interest of full disclosure, I want to say I do not know either candidate, never laid eyes on either one of them.  However, I defy anyone with an IQ over 65 to focus on one of Vic Rawl’s televised statements or commercials and not have your mind wander off somewhere or possibly even fall asleep.  No narcoleptics, please!

These are the reasons I have heard as to why the favored candidate was not nominated:

  1. There were so many blacks voting in the Democrat primary that they voted for Greene because they thought he was black since blacks spell Green with three e’s.
  2. There is a black singer named Alvin Greene and the blacks voting in the primary thought they were voting for him.
  3. The voting machines were faulty or fixed.
  4. People voted for Greene because they didn’t know either candidate and his was the first name on the ballot.

I thought Democrats liked having blacks participate in their primaries.  They sure do go to a lot of trouble to make sure they vote for their candidate in general elections.  Republicans would like to have just a few of them vote in their primaries, but they hardly ever do.  What a shame. However, it turns out that Democrats only like having them vote in their primaries when they do what they’re told.  If they get a re-vote on their primary, can I ask for a re-vote in the Republican primary for governor? That was a pretty bizarre result too.

The voting machines were fixed!  Someone told me he tried to vote for Vic Rawl and the machine voted him for Alvin Greene.  Have you ever stopped to think how stupid that accusation is?  The machine shows you who you are going to vote for and if you don’t like it, you have the ability to return to the ballot and change your vote.

Election Official: Did the voter say anything to the poll manager?

Voter: No, but I voted for Rawl and it said I was voting for Greene.

Election official: Did you go back and change your vote?

Voter: I didn’t know I could.

Gentle Reader, this is not a problem with the voting machine.  This is a problem with the voter.  May I suggest this voter might be better suited to living in Broward County, Florida?

It is possible that Alvin benefited from being the first name on the ballot.  Other candidates, particularly in contests in which neither candidate is known, have so benefited before.

Republicans used to draw for ballot position, which I think is imminently fair.  In fact, in the first statewide primary the Republican Party ever had, the winners, Edwards and Campbell, drew second place position behind Westmoreland and Morrissette, respectively.  I guess that proves Republicans are more intelligent than Democrats.  Well, no. It probably just proves that when no one has ever heard of either candidate, it is possible for the first position candidate to benefit.

Those Democrats are hard to satisfy.  They talk about green jobs, green buildings, green policies, but now that they have a “Greene” candidate, they don’t like him.

What happened to the good ol’ days when we just fixed the result?  They’re gone, Jim.  They’re gone!    No (elephant) dung!

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One Comment to “Finally, a Greene candidate!”

  1. Anybody can elect a governor or senator who embarrasses your state. Happens all the time. South Carolina. Illinois. New York. You name it. But the Greene election is different. This time the shame isn’t on the candidate. This time it’s on the voters. Of all the political embarrassments I can remember in our state, the election of Alvin Greene by the Democrats is the most humiliating. It reflects poorly on every voter who casted a ballot for him. Criticize Carol Fowler all you want but this one is one the people who voted.

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